Sunday, December 11, 2011

My Talk With Poo & Fake Lesbians

Poo is my 'ex' best friend.  We have known each other since I was 10 years old.  That was 17 years ago.  I have known this chick for the majority of my life.  There have been gaps of time where there was no communication.  The time when I left PG County public schools at the end of 9th grade.  Then again in like 2003 for about a year or so.  Then again in like 2005.  We have been back in touch with each other since 2010 and things have been going well.  I love this girl.  She is like my family.  I am closer to her than most of my family. 

So that's the history about me and Poo.  So....last night we were on the phone talking about random things.  Some of those things were our childhood, childhood friends, The L Word, sexuality, so much.  It was a great conversation.  I love that I can talk to her about everything.  I mean---I feel like I can talk to her about everything; good things, bad things, embarrassing things, crazy things, my mom, my strained relationships, and even when I'm pissed at her.  We weren't always like this---but I am blessed that our relationship is what it is today.

I call her mother my aunt.  I just spend last weekend with her and her mother---decorating my aunt's Christmas tree and having dinner together.  Good times---really good times.  So, that weekend made me sad a little bit.  Because I don't have a close relationship with my mother, like Poo has with her own.  I talked to my aunt for hours---and we can also talk about everything.  I asked my Aunt about her new marriage; if she's happy, if it's hard, does she love it, would she recommend marriage, about raising children, being a single mom, so many things.  She loves God, she give me great advice, and she loves me in spite of my sexuality.  She is very into her religion and faith, but she doesn't treat me any different since I came out to her about a year ago---not really sure when. 

I have digressed.  So, I am not sure what I wanted to blog about.  But Poo and I had a great talk last night.  I am watching the second half of season 7 of Grey's Anatomy and I was disgusted and bothered.  I like to think the show is so progressive for having a lesbian couple who is going the distance for one another.  They were like the model relationship for a long time.  The 1 chick 'Arizona' leaves to do work in Africa and her woman 'Cali' (not sure of the spelling) stayed in Seattle.  So Cali commences to fucking this male doctor and gets pregnant.  And now Arizona must step up and be parent to this child that her girlfriend conceived with someone else.  What a fucking gyp.  Maybe I am so upset because realistically, most of these fake ass women who claim to be lesbians, are actually getting dicked down by men and still fucking women too.  Its gross and its offensive.  If you are lesbian----you are a woman who likes other women.  If you are a woman who is having sex with both men and women---you are NOT a lesbian.  The thing is---its probably true.  More times than not---women who claim to be lesbian, are still getting dicked down by men.   Which is so insulting to real lesbians who only have sex with other women.  FAKE ass lesbians put real lesbians at risks for all sorts of diseases because they are getting penetrated by dick and then allowing some women (real lesbian) to go behind that dick.

I guess I sound crazy.  Maybe bitter.  I dont know. But I think about meeting feminine lesbians---because feminine lesbian women are so fucking beautiful and appealing, and then I get disgusted at the idea that they are claiming to be lesbian but really like dick.  And these women who say that they dont identify with labels and they just love whoever they love---thats a fucking mess.  What the fuck do you mean you dont identify with a label?  Either you like dick or pussy or both or neither.  What is so hard about that?

The crazy thing is---I haven't had to deal with the before mentioned scenario.  But my ex did.  And she gave me hell for it.  Always thinking I was going to start liking and fucking dudes.  Which I never have.  She was so scarred because her ex cheated on her with a guy---got knocked up---and then she took the cheating bitch back.  That's her problem, not mine.  But why cant women just be honest with the person they are dealing with and themselves?  If you take dick---why not just be honest and say you take dick?  Why say you dont identify with labels?  Why do you think you get to call yourself a lesbian when you are NOT?

So my best friend (Pootah) was in a similar situation.  This is not the same girl as Poo.  Also, I guess its important to say that Pootah is a dominant female; she dresses like a boy.  So anyway, she dated this ignorant ass girl with 3 kids.  Thats a big ass, glaring red flag for me.  So my best friend dated this girl and the girl was still having sex with her child's father.  I would actually expect that in a situation like that.  If the bitch has 3 kids by 2-3 different men----its pretty clear that she likes men and dick. 

Is there somewhere, where I can meet a genuine lesbian, that actually likes women and only women?  That hasn't been fucking men for years and wont go back to fucking men in the future?  I am not so ignorant to think that lesbians cant pass diseases to one another.  But the chances are far more slim compared to sex with men.  And please don't assume that I dont like men.  Because I do like men.  They are cool with me.  I just don't want to fuck them or be in a relationship with them.  I like women. I have always liked women.  I like a woman's anatomy, the feel of her soft skin, the smells of a woman, the smell of pussy, how woman have significantly less body hair than men, how women are nurturing, how women are beautiful, how women are sweet, emotional, and all that other good stuff. 

Soooooo over fake ass lesbians (and bi-sexuals).

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