Sunday, June 12, 2011

New Found Freedom!!!

Hello people.  So, I just confessed about the hardships of breaking up.  I mean, we all go through it.  We have all dealt with break-ups and some are easier than others.  So, after the break-up, there's a whole new can of warms to deal with.

After adjusting to sleeping alone every night, after losing my dependency on my ex, after all the tears shed, what is next?  I will tell you what is next.  Living your damn life.  Making hard decisions.  Doing things you wouldn't ordinarily do.  And that is exactly what I did.  I took steps in directions that I never did before.  I took leaps of faith and hoped for a positive outcome.  I couldnt be afraid of any and everything anymore.  I was alone and had to learn to adjust to my independence.  I started getting on the computer more, putting myself out there more, talking to strangers (oh my), and meeting new people.  I applied for school, I stopped emotional eating, and I took risks.  I felt like, what the fuck did I have to lose? 

I did not want to even think about meeting other women or getting into a new relationship.  I was more interested in making new friends.  Especially since I pushed all my real friends away, while I was in that toxic relationship.  I was interested in meeting people/women with similar interest.  I was interested in going back to school for my Masters.  I was thinking about doing positive things for myself.  Because in that last relationship, I was more worried about taking care of my girl than taking care of me.  I was more concerned that she was happy and content and had everything she needed and wanted.  My wants and needs and desires and goals, all took a back seat to that relationship.  So now, it was time for me to start to remember that I had once set goals for myself.

So, after the break up comes a bit of freedom.  I was free to come, go, stay, and do whatever the hell I wanted to do. I didnt have to consider anyone else.  I didnt have to worry about my exes schedule and if I should be picking her up soon.  This new found freedom was kind of fun and exciting; Its even better when you know what to do with it.  



I was free to admire other women without feeling any guilt.  I was free to talk on the phone to whoever I wanted.  I was free to make plans and not feel guilty for them.  I was free to come and go as I damn well pleased.  It was nice.  And I recommend that anyone dealing with a break enjoy your new found freedom.

2 comments:

  1. I knew you would arrive at this phase, I have myself been through it :)

    Give a pat on your back for this, it takes a while to realise that life can exist beyond the realms created by your 'ex'..

    You mentioned that you are pursuing your masters, will you please elaborate on exactly which subject you will be reading?
    You see I too am pursuing my masters, in mass communication and journalism to be precise.

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  2. Yep. I am not presently taking classes. However, I want to be an adoption counselor or adoption agent or however you call it. So I will take up classes and a degree that will allow me to become that. I dont really have myself together, so I probably wont be enrolling in classes until Fall 2012.

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