Sunday, December 5, 2010

December and the Holidays

I am beyond overjoyed because its Christmas time.  I love the holiday season...I love shopping (if and when I have the money to do so), I love Christmas music and songs, I love everything about November 22 through January 2.  I find that people are nicer, kinder, and I can't contain myself.  I think people are just more generous and giving around this time of the year.  And whatever the reason is...I love it.  I hate to say Christmas and exclude some many people---I just mean the holidays and all the holiday celebrations and festivities. 

This time of year I get nostalgic---I think about my childhood, Santa, gifts under the tree, church, family members gathering together, and Mariah  I love this time of the year. 

I am an Ellen freak and I have been watching her shows everyday---as I have been unemployed since August of this year.  She is freakin' hilarious.  Anyway, she is doing the 12Days give-a-way or something like that...and the audience members go hysterical when she mentions it.  I can't wait to see what it's like and what she gives away.  I see that she already does so much for needy families and military families.  All of this just reminds me that people are out there cold as hell, hungry as ever, and without family.  I don't want to take for granted the many blessings that I have in my life.  I also want to have a generous heart and encourage others to be generous as well.  We can do small things like donating old (but wearable)clothes, drop off canned goods, and give a dollar here and there.  We can do big things like donate our time at churches and soup kitchens-to feed the less fortunate.

So, I don't want to put a negative spin on this time of year, I just want to bring awareness. 
I have been having a rough time with my family---most of whom I can stand.  But I do want to have some sort of relationship with my mother and I miss her.  Of course this time of year is the hardest.  So, I don't know if I will see my mother this Christmas or not.  I didn't see her this year for Thanksgiving, for the first time in 26 years :-(.  It was a decision that I felt I had to make and I don't regret it.  I just hope that in the next 20 days or so, we can come to some middle ground and make the holidays magical for the both of us. And I am a hopeless romantic and an optimist and some more.  I love the Hallmark Channel and LMN station this time of year.  I SINCERELY believe in miracles and good people.  I think anything is possible this time of year----I can't explain why, but I just feel this way.  So, say a prayer for me that I can start 2011 with a more position and healthier relationship with my kin folks. 

Seasons Greetings!!!!!!

1 Girl 5 Gays...

So, I just learned about the show on Logo entitled 1 Girl 5 Gays.  I don't know what I say.  I am pissed off for certain reasons...but I love the show.  I guess I feel like why can't I be the 1 girl.  Or 1 of the gays for that matter.  But then again...I don't know how comfortable I would feel answering some of those questions on television---for the whole world to know.  I am not as shy amongst close friends. 

But let me jump off topic really quick.  I am a HAG looking for her Fag.  And please don't get all politically correct on me.  I would never disrespect my fellow gays.  I know the term Fag Hag, but don't know any quivalent term.  Let me correct myself....I am a Hag, looking for her queer.  I love gay boys and I want me a gay BFF.  I like some of the boys on the show and I think I could potentially get along with some of them.  1 guy, however, seems to be a pompous, uptight, and a know-it-all.  What is the big deal with this phenomenon?  Why do women love gay men so much?  I mean, sometimes I question if that is actually what I want.  I watch the A List: New York , also airs on Logo, and those queens drive me insane.  They seem so fucking 2faced and full-o-drama.  I don't want a queer bff like that.  I want a bff that is sweet, kind, funny, generous, down-to-earth, a little crazy, and fun, fun, and more fun.  And of course someone I can talk to and TRUST.  I think I just described!  I just don't want the drama and phoniness and fakeness and bullshit.  And I get that Reality TV is the opposite of reality.  I get that things are scripted and boring doesn't get ratings.  So, I imagine that some of the boys on the A List: New York are more decent than they are edited to
Back to the subject at hand, I enjoy the show (1 Girl 5 Gays)...the questions are cool...but the answers are better.  I love the chemistry between the boys and how I find myself laughing out loud at some of the responses.  Is it strange that gay men can say how fucking sexy a woman is and talk about every piece of her anatomy as if it was nothing; but a gay girl talking about a sexy man is... 'bi'.  Maybe that is just me and the folks I hang around.  I think hearing a lesbo talk about how sexy Denzel is just makes her sound like a straight woman.  Or even to talk about a man's physique---it's like "Is she a lesbian, is she bi, did he just get her wet"?  I guess I am a little small-minded. 

Anyway, I want to be on the the 1 girl.  I want to ask all the dirty questions... ;-)!!!  Anyway, I have set my DVR to record the show, but I believe it comes on Friday nights at 11pm.  Check it out sometime and let me know what you think. 

I will most likely be back to talk about the boys once I really learn their names and personalities.  Some are hilarious and some are a HOT mess!


I'm Back...I think!

So I feel like a complete flake.  I started to love my blog and really got the hang of things...until I got SUCKED into the YouTube hoopla!  I joined RonniewiththeT blog and his blog was attached to his YouTube page.  He had 1 or 2 videos max and I thought it was really neat.  I never thought it was anything that I would ever consider doing--for a number of reasons.  So, I had just turned 26 years old, my life was not where I wanted it to be, and I felt like I better start taking some chances and living my life.  So....I created a YouTube page and learned how to upload videos.  I was nervous and insecure initially, but I got a little bit of followers and it was the best thing ever.  I am happy for the events that transpired in my life, that actually gave me the courage to create AND upload a video.  But now, my fucking laptop is OUT OF COMMISSION and my girlfriend's computer (the one I am using to type this) does not have a web cam.  My cellphone does not record without some damn memory card and I am just feeling technologically challenged right now.  But I am missing YouTube :-(....a lot!  I feel like I am missing out on things and missing out on my opportunities to gain more followers.  Anyway, I guess it happened so that I could stick to my initial commitment...which was my blog on blog spot.  I mean people get so lazy.  Me personally, I don't read much; haven't read a book since college; frankly....A HOT ASS MESS!!!  I know the importance of reading and how smart I could become just by reading books.  But I am too lazy.  And I allowed YouTube to get me away from typing and expressing myself this way.  So, having got that off my chest....I believe I will be back soon.  And maybe for as long as my computer is broke.